Saturday, December 4, 2010

Never Forget

It has been six years ago today that I gave birth to my son Spencer Thomas. He never took a breath in this world and I will always miss him. Cal and I were still in the first year of out marriage when we found out we were going to have a baby. The excitement was overwhelming! The plans we made, the dreams we had. After Thanksgiving I just didn't feel well. I went to the doctor alone. He couldn't find a heartbeat. (I was unaware of this at the time) He said he wanted something double checked and I went to the imaging center for an ultrasound.
By this time I was in panic mode and had called my mom. Cal was at work and a little part of me still believed everything would be fine.
It wasn't. The doctor told my mother and I that the baby had died. Apparently a blood clot had blocked the umbilical cord.
I was in the hospital 4 days, being induced into labor. Cal never left my side. I will never forget dancing to Brenda Lee's "Rocking Around the Christmas Tree" with Cal the night before. Or the fact that my father-in-law never left Cal's side. It was so important that Cal have that support.
There are so many little memories tucked away. I will never forget.
It is important to remember Spencer, he brought Cal and I closer together in a way that can not be explained.

Every "even" year we buy an ornament for Spencer to add to the family Christmas tree....

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